Sunday, October 28, 2012

A Promised Spanking (yikes)

AND so it begins

Friday was the start of a slew of days off for Barney.  I was so excited.  Too excited I suppose.  Submissive Sally was out in full force too!  Life was good.  Finally some one on one, with out 2,3 and 4 in the house.  He had mentioned to me earlier in the week that there were a few things we were going to discuss...as in actually talk about.  Plus I was hoping--well you know what it is like with kids old enough to KNOW what is going on when Mom and Dad are MIA- and they were gone for 8 whole hours..* *wink**.  NOT!

 We did our errands in the morning, and I was feverishly hand sewing my  #*%! costume.  Child number 2 was going to be home in just over an hour.  Barney?  Lost in some wing of our town house.  Seriously, where was he.  Eventually, he came to me and said he was taking our mutt ( and I use that in the most affectionate way) for a walk.  It was, after all over 20 degrees Celsius outside. 

Well FINE then..there goes all hope of anything 'fun' or even having a private discussion until Monday.  Pfft. Huff.     -What?-  OH.... here comes Distancing Dixie and Defiant Debbie skipping down the road, and Submissive Sally? pushed into the ditch.  Sigh. 

Major pout on.  Get it together Wilma.  Nope- didn't happen.  Barney left for his walk and I stewed...and then SHOCKING...tears ( again!). Well THIS time I'm not even going to think about it!  Nope I'm in a temper tantrum and I'm not going to talk myself out of it! ( Not such a great plan. I don't recommend it.  It feels horrible, once the dust settles).  So there I was fuming because it feels so much better than being disappointed. BTW before ttwd, I wouldn't have cared where Barney was, as long as he wasn't bugging me.

Barney came back well before his projected arrival.  He sat down to talk to me.  My attitude didn't improve.  We talked about my exercising and my list for the day.  I told him I hadn't made one.  HA!  Take that Mr. I didn't even notice HoH. ( again, DO NOT go this route).  Eventually after what can only be described as a 5 year old temper tantrum, Barney said,

" Alright that is it, let's go"

" No'

"What?"

"No . _________ is going to be home in like 10 minutes."

" Yeah well I don't want to wait all weekend"

" Oh well" ( I know..I know...right?)

With that he left and sat on our front step-probably trying to calm down, so as to NOT kill his wife.  I  returned to my sewing- actively not giving it any thought.  Child #2 returned home wondering why Dad seemed so sad on the front step.  WONDERFUL work Wilma.  You're a real prize. They went off to shoot some hoops.  I stayed behind and, wait for it.....cried.

When he returned, I apologized to Barney.  In person too!  Yay Wilma..no letters, but big girl words!  I told him that I was so excited for our day off together, and disappointed how the day turned out.  I told him that the way he was reacting to me this week was very confusing.  I expressed that it was just as hard for me as it was for him ttwd. That I sometimes feel like I am giving something he doesn't want.  

He reassured me that this was not the case.  He said he could understand that his actions in the past week would be confusing to me.  He apologized for letting things get this far without some sort of action.

I said I balked at his threat to spank me because I wasn't sure he wanted to actually do it.  Perhaps I was manipulating the situation again- to which I received this reply

" Oh I wanted to spank you alright."

 He said the idea of it was not something he was completely comfortable with, but he was more than willing to carry this through.  He believes it is important. (yikes).



We went to our party Friday night.  He was the belle of the ball.  All the women loved his costume.  He even danced!  I too had fun, but not as much as he did.  I, ( get this, you're going to love this) was advice girl.  Seriously, people kept coming up to me with their problems.  This one guy in particular kept cornering me!  Even friends remarked, ' What was with the guy in the suit?  Stalking you"  I know right?  If he only knew who he was seeking advice from !  Truth is, in my younger, happier days, this happened to me ALL THE TIME. lol.  When John Travolta, Barney wasn't groovin' on the dance floor, and I was not Dr.Phil, we were pretty much inseparable.  On of our friends even said, "  What's with you two?" Normally we get to a party, and Barney goes one way, and Wilma, well she buzzes around like a bee on crack in a nursery.

When we finally fell into bed that night, I ( pumped up with liquid courage) asked Barney

" Um, are you going to spank me on Monday?

" Yup"

" oh, okay"

" Don't worry about it right now okay ?"

OH YEAH SURE!!!  ...well he did  make me a little distracted *blush*

 Party number 2 was a GREAT time.  Once again Barney's costume was a HUGE hit.  I had to explain mine to some people who didn't know me.  As for the one's who knew, they loved it too!  I absolutely adore the people we were with.  I laughed, and laughed, and made people laugh until tears were down  our faces.  I am so fortunate to know so many wonderful, TWISTED people!

I am not as anxious about tomorrow as I should be, mostly because I have never experienced what I apparently am going to.  I have been trying to not think about it.  I know that this is long overdue, and this is what we agreed on.  Barney has still been his happy go lucky self, until I slip it into the conversation. He then stands a little straighter, his voice seems to deepen, and well, then I change the subject again.

I think I'll just concentrate on remembering how much fun I had last night.  Oh and fill out my list and EXERCISE!<- Too little too late, but it is the start of a new week, and I don't want to give Mr. HoH any more reasons to 'exercise' his right arm.

19 comments:

  1. Glad your costumes were such a hit after all yhour hard work. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

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  2. Thanks Sunny.

    I'm certainly going to try :) Think I'll keep busy. My list is very long today after, um, neglecting it over the past few days in due to costume prep.

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  3. Congrats - all that hard work on the costumes really paid off! Do not think about tomorrow. Simply keep busy, enjoy the day, and quit slipping any reference into the conversation - tomorrow will come soon enough.

    Blessings,
    Cat

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  4. I'm not sure I am going to feel that all the hard work paid off tomorrow :)


    Some of the slipping references in are coming from the Man himself. Yesterday for example, I said I really needed to go lay down as I was oh so tired and everything was starting to annoy me. I said, I didn't want to get in trouble, his response. " You are already in trouble"

    Anyway, soon enough he will be retreating to the Man Cave to watch football all afternoon, so I should be good :)

    Happy Sunday Cat!

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  5. Hey Willie :)
    So glad you had lots of fun! I have noticed since beginning dd that people seem to become aware of the changes. People have made remarks about our closeness, although usually hidden in some comment about sex. We had two locals over the other night, much younger than us, and when they were leaving, quite uncharacteristically the quiet one said, "you'll be glad we are going, don't do anything we would"t" ?!
    Others pick up on the change, and in some cases there is curiosity and a little envy, I think. Many relationships, I hate to say, are complete train wrecks. :(
    Okay - don't think about it. Ian stopped telling me about impending spankings because I would stew about it all night, not sleep and be a cranky bear come the event, and in worse trouble than ever.
    This is important, because Barmey is making a decision and he is acting on it - so make sure Submissive Sally shows up to that date.
    Don't forget to snuggle, if Barney allows it, after. And don't imagine it - because our imagination can make expectations that are difficult to live up to.....
    Good luck, Sweetie
    love ya
    lillies
    I'll be thinking of ya...... :)

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  6. Good morning Lillie. Are you prepping for HoH Appreciation Day at your house?

    He mentioned when we started down this road, the there most definitely be holding after. Another reason why he didn't push matters on Friday when our son was due to come home.

    Barney didn't technically say anything about tomorrow. I asked him if he was going to, although I did already know the answer. I am hoping this is a unique situation, having to wait this long. I'd like to say that a punishment spanking would be a unique situation too...somehow I doubt it.

    I'm not imagining anything to live up to. I can't help think this whole thing is going to be so awkward to be honest. When he did maintenance a couple of weeks ago, ( I think it was more just him getting used to the idea) I just ended up being angry after. I really hope, I can't believe I am saying this, but he goes past the anger portion of 'this'. I'm sure Submissive Sally will be over, I just hope she stays for the whole show.

    Thanks for the thoughts :)

    A Little Nervous

    Willie

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  7. You helped me remember a funny moment when I went and apologized to my husband a few hours after behaving terribly. He hugged me and forgave me and then said something about putting my big girl panties on and doing the right thing. LOL. Apologizing is hard work. Good for you.

    I'm with Lillie. Don't think about tomorrow actively and when you do, remind yourself how much he loves you and why he is going to do it...to help both of you become closer, to add one more notch in the betterment of your marriage. If you keep that kind of perspective even if nervous, you can almost simile inside. You'll go into it with the right attitude and hopefully not get left in that angry place. Good luck Willie!!! You are both going to do great.

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    1. Stupid blog! For some reason it posted SNP's post in between your's an my answer despite the fact I did them 15 minutes apart.

      My reply for this is down below SNP post.

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  8. I am glad you guys had a good time at your party. I hope all will go well for you tomorrow. It would be hard not to think on it. But, as you say, you agreed on this so I know you can do your part and do it well. Thinking of you as well. Take care.

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    1. Thanks SNP

      Like I said, I'm not as nervous as I would be, I'm supposing, if I've experienced this before. Perhaps it is the unknown that is frightening a bit.

      I know the 'discomfort' isn't going to last forever. I will try my best for Barney's sake to take this in stride.

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  9. Oh Susie,

    You made me weepy,(not that that is difficult these days). Reading your post has given me butterflies in my stomach. This all kind of seems surreal right now. I really don't want to be left in that angry place. I really just want to get to the other side of this already.

    I worry too, that this is going to be so hard on him. I can see him stopping early because of that. But then again, who knows.

    Thanks for your support again :)

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  10. I know how upset when my husband doesn't take advantage of alone time. I don't know if he has yet figured it out. I hope that he follows through on Monday. Try really hard to not have any expecations. Which, for me, is the hardest thing to do. Remember that he is in charge of when, how and why the spanking happens. Yes, I know, easier said than done. I hate promised spankings because if he doesn't follow through, I feel so disappointed and lost. So I am really hoping that it all goes well and that your bum is hurting tomorrow night. Lol

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  11. Um, Thanks Blondie? LOL

    As nervous as I am, I can see how even more hurt I could be if he changes his mind. I really don't think that would be a very good thing. But, like you said, it is his decision to make, and I will carry on whichever way this ends up.

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  12. I commented earlier! Who knows where it's gone. I'm sure what I said was so amazingly brilliant that blogger was stunned and simply spun my words into the heavens. Ahem... (clearing throat)...

    Basically, and in the much shorter version, I said I don't know you and Barney from Eve and Adam, except for what you write, so the only thing I know to do is tell you what I do when I am feeling wiggy about something (I was much more eloquent before). I pray, and I breathe. I explained before all the things I pray for. I always try to remember to breathe. I'm sure you'll have no trouble with either, and both help. Then I said to keep communicating, and described a bit about myself and D regarding our specific issues in this area. Thinking back, this was a long comment!

    You'll be fine, however it plays out. This is discovery time. You believe in each other. It may be perfect, or mistakes might be made by either/both of you. Awkward, safe, close, scary, funny...no idea which way it will turn. But, no matter what happens, you still have each other. Just remember, this will be something you discuss later, perhaps through tears, hopefully with laughter later on down this road.

    I guess I managed to make this not so short after all, but the earlier comment was a doozy! I'll be thinking of you - that's almost a little weird to say, considering what you may be involved in while I'm thinking! Lol! But all my thoughts will be for your emotions, that you find peace, love, happiness, safety, security, resolution, more submission and whatever else you seek.

    Irishey

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    1. Hi Irishey!

      Thanks for commenting, apparently twice. I wish I would have been able to read your first one, not that there was anything wrong with this one *wink*

      Suprisingly, I am not as nervous, at the moment as I was last night. HOWEVER, seeing how my emotions never seem to stay in one spot for very long these days, who knows how I'll feel 3 minutes from now.

      Thanks for thinking of me today!

      Willie

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  13. Aw, this is cute. I don't mean feeling ignored and crying, but how you worked things out in the end. I hope tomorrow goes better than you think it will.

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    1. Hi Ana!

      Well feeling ignored before ttwd happened, but there wasn't usually any resolution after the fact. So despite what might happen today, it was worth the tears I suppose.

      Thanks for taking the time to send some reassuring words.

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  14. So glad the costumes were a hit and you had a good time at the party.

    I understand your disappointment at missing out on time together and your reaction to it. Sorry, I'm a little late commenting so not sure if the spanking has happened yet. I understand you being nervous, it's hard not to be. As Susie said, remind yourself of the overall aim - to bring you closer and stronger.

    Hugs!

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    1. Good morning Roz...and that is what it is here...early morning.

      So no the event has yet to take place. In fact our oldest was sick in the night,(he get sick sometimes with his allergies, because of the sinus headaches and is often fine in the morning)so who knows WHAT if anything is going to happen today.

      I will so desperately try to remember all the kind words and words of wisdom offered to me over the past 24 hours today regardless of the outcome.


      Thanks for the hugs!

      I hope you have/had a great Monday.

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